Last Day of Summer

Dear Taylor, Anna, and Hudson,

We wanted the last day of summer to be low key, stress free and FUN!  

We hooked up with two other families and headed to the beach.  

The day was far better than we could have dreamed.  

We went to a new spot for lunch, then wandered down to the greatest beach spot imaginable.  

The waitress at Moss Beach Distillery was nervous when the 17 of us rolled in.

She asked us to remind the kids that there were other people in the restaurants.

We gave the 11 kids a stern warning and crossed our fingers.

All of you were angels, for the most part.

The waitress warmed right up and was super nice.

The only small issue was hudson relieving himself on my lap just as my food arrived:)

The dads held court at one peaceful end of the table.

 Taylor, you and Sophia looked deep into something...... and it turns out it was an ipad.

 Now, the beach.

 Hudson,  you were not really interested in the group shot.

But you were happy as a clam playing in the sand.

 Surfer girl.

A perfect end to a great summer.

xoxo

mom

Taking time..... five months later.

Kiddos,

I walked out of my office on April 7 and have not been back.  

I will not go back.  

After 10 years of success, failure, partnership, struggle, 

breakthrough, creativity, 

three babies, five homes, ten years of marriage, 

four bosses, five offices, 

every childcare configuration imaginable, 

that chapter is closed, 

and I am heartbroken.  

Not because I don't love being with you, 

but because it is like it never happened.  

No recognition, no celebration, nothing.  

Actually, not heartbroken, fucking pissed.  (excuse my language).

There is a song by Paul Simon called Ten Years.

He wrote it for Oprah to celebrate her tenth year.

These lyrics are on repeat in my brain:

Ten years come and gone so fast

I might as well be dreamingSunny days have burned a pathAcross another seasonA fortune rises to the skyTen years come and gone so fast

We will find a new rhythm. 

 I will find a way to function without all these medications. 

This will be a blink.  Everyone keeps saying that.  I just wished it wouldn't be.

I grew up in that job.  

I sat at a desk there while you walked your first steps Taylor.  

I left that office and went to labor and delivery more times than I remember.  

Anna, I learned that you were JUST a club foot baby sitting at a desk there.  

So many life changing moments happened while I was there.

So many life changing experiences for me while I was there.

About a week ago, I told you three I would leave my job.

Taylor, you looked at me with the most soulful eyes you said,

"but you love your job, why would you leave it."

Because life is complicated and I love you three so much more.

xoxo

mom

ps-TGIF! This week has kicked my ass.

pss- again, sorry about the swear words

First day of preschool!!

My sweet boy,

I can hardly believe that you are three years old and started preschool today.  

You have had such a great few weeks- giving up baba, your crib, etc.  

We knew you were ready to start school.  

It is a big milestone- three kids in school.  

The girls were more excited than you this morning.

You were a bit nervous about all of it.

I am certain you are my son- you went directly to the vacuum as soon as you got to class:) 

Then magnatile building for about 2 seconds.

 You refused to take a picture with dad.

The teacher then encouraged parents to leave so they could get going.

Daddy told you a big secret- all the fun happens when the parents leave and boy was that true.

You drew pictures with Ms. Doa- I am pretty sure we will frame this.

I definitely didn't think you could draw, and really didn't think you knew how to write letters.

Clearly you were more than ready for schools.

You even had daddy's glasses!

It is going to be such a great year buddy!

xoxo

mom

Back to school... back to reality

Well my sweet girls,

Summer is over and you are back to school.  

1 down, 179 to go- woot woot.  

We had such a smooth, easy morning- I loved it!

 xoxo

mom