Today

Dear Taylor, Anna, and Hudson,

Today is a terribly sad day.  A man went into an elementary school and killed twenty children and seven adults.  It is absolutely devastating, and all I wanted to do all day was leave work and go get you at school to give you hugs.  

I had a terrible commute home, so Kitsy met me in San Carlos, we got a quick dinner, and then cookies to take in the car while we drove down Christmas Tree lane checking out the lights.  While humanity showed its best and worst today, we tried to focus on the great joys of childhood.  We didn't turn on the television when we got home, we chose Christmas music and stories.  I just don't think you need to be exposed to any of this yet.  I want you to feel like our world is safe.  I want you to feel safe at school, safe in our neighborhood, and most importantly safe in our home.  We have had so much to be sad about this year, and frankly, I just want you to have a chance to focus on the great joys of the holiday.

Another random note about today.  Hubbie's mom Nama died ten years ago today.  Here is what I remember about my Nama.  She was impeccably dressed.  She would wear plaid skirts, blouses and wool sweaters.  She was almost always dressed in greens and browns, and ALWAYS wore lipstick.  Nama had a nap every afternoon and had a bourbon and water when she woke up.  

Last totally random thing.  I have been thinking a lot about the poem I read at Grandpa's funeral.  It makes me cry to think about it, as I really really hope that Grandpa knew that I was so incredibly grateful to have him for a father.  He was the most generous, giving person you will ever know.


As We Look Back
We find ourselves wondering .....
Did we remember to thank you enough
For all you have done for us?
For all the times you were by our sides
To help and support us .....
To celebrate our successes
To understand our problems
And accept our defeats?
Or for teaching us by your example,
The value of hard work, good judgement,
Courage and integrity?
We wonder if we ever thanked you
For the sacrifices you made.
To let us have the very best?
And for the simple things
Like laughter, smiles and times we shared?
If we have forgotten to show our
Gratitude enough for all the things you did,
We're thanking you now.
And we are hoping you knew all along,
How much you meant to us.

by Unknown Author

As we look back over time

SO, my sweet babies.  I leave this sad post with a deep gratitude that I get to be your mom, and for each day we are together.  Out of this tragedy at the elementary school, we will hear stories of great heroes, and gut-wrenching stories about the untimely loss of lives.  I love you all more than words.

xoxo

mom